Thursday, May 3, 2012
April 365 "Dear Diary Snippets"
Today was an amazing family day filled with tons of quality time. The kids awoke in our hotel room bright and early under the assumption that we were going to hit the pool at 8 am, all because the sign said the pool opened at 8 am. (They woke us up at about 6:30 am, fully dressed in bathing suits and scuba masks. If it wouldn't have been so early I would have found this completely hysterical. As it was, Adrain and I rubbed the sleep out of our eyes and told them to wait at least until after breakfast. That may have been the longest wait of their lives.)
The sun came out and because out vacation was just getting started, we decided to hit the beach with kids (still cold, in spite of sunshine, but that's life in the Pacific NW). We ate dinner at a restaurant that would have been awful if the whole thing hadn't been so stinkin' funny. Poor Adrain.... all he wanted was some crab. I think our gluten-free requirements threw the entire place into a dither. Then... after kiddos had been tucked in for the night, we got a phone call that our dog Lucy had gone missing, so we frantically packed up and drove home through the night with sobbing kiddos. Ugh.
So yeah... we left the hotel at about 9 pm last night, and drove the 6 hour drive home. We were still about three hours from home when she was located and transported to an emergency vet hospital. We were warned it didn't look good. We got home just in time for Adrain to go in and say good bye to our doggy. The kids and I huddled together in my bed, crying the whole time we waited for him, and it was around 4 am by the time Adrain got home and we all finally crawled into our own beds and we went through most of this day in a fog.
Well, today felt weird but as we did laundry and tried to get our bearings, Ava suggested cupcakes to celebrate Lucy's dog life. If nothing else, it made us smile for a while. Our cupcakes totally rocked. Gluten free vanilla bean was Ava's choice. Gosh I hate seeing my kids cry. At bedtime, I was brushing my teeth when I heard the sniffling outside my door. I peeked around and my girl was starting to cry- I asked what was wrong, (totally forgetting for a second) and she wailed, "I miss Lucyyyyyyy." Two hours later, I had her calmed down. Sometimes it's hard to be a Mama.
Today I dug out Gwenyth Paltrow's cookbook (you know, the one I've been meaning to make something out of) and decided to actually make a two week menu, and grocery list. It's the first time in about six months that I've done that. It felt good to stock up the house and make something fresh. Something about being in the kitchen and putting things in order feeds the soul.
I hate to say it, but I felt like I was just going through the motions all day long. I think everyone else had a good time. It passed in kind of a blur...
It sure doesn't feel like Easter this year.
Easter. He is risen and thank God for that. Literally.
I began this day by setting my alarm and beginning at the feet of Jesus. I prayed over my kids and my man and after dropping hoodlums off, I hit the trail and listened to an amazing worship playlist, basking in the sunshine, on my favorite morning walk. I pony tailed my hair and ran around, checking off errands, and then came home and painted those stripes I've been wanting to paint in the studio. They turned out amazing. I needed that.
I have sunshine seeping through my windows today. Much needed. Much appreciated.
I love it when I pin an idea and then ACTUALLY do it.
A storm moved in and I couldn't help snapping a photo of the creepy looking clouds and sky. It quickly turned black. I laughed and said, "Hey God, there's a dark cloud hanging over my house." Of course there was.. but not in the sense I was joking about. Mostly.
Who knew JJ loved lemon poppy seed muffins? You think you know somebody...
I bought myself some stationery. I think I need a pen pal. Ha!
Apparently one can never have too many nerf guns. Especially in a neighborhood where nerf wars constantly break out on a daily basis. My yard gets invaded by many little boys on the warpath. It might be one of the cutest things ever...They spend 50% of their time discussing rules. Which apparently are a very central part of the game, and to be taken very seriously. Then they proceed to play, shooting everything that moves. They frequently stop and have discussions/arguments about whether a hit constituted a "kill" and if that person was out of the game or not. It often boils down to technicalities. Apparently if you are hit in the leg, you can't use that leg... and if you are hit in both legs, that means you'd better be crawling. (Which explains the many hopping and crawling boys in my backyard right now.) Then after the bullets are spent, everyone goes into neutral time out and begins the laborious process of bullet collecting. This tends to take a long time, as they match up who's bullets belong to which guns and count them to make sure all are accounted for. And then it starts all over again.
These lemon cookies were amazing and now all the Meyer lemons are gone and I don't feel guilty about wasting them.
Nothing makes me happier than hearing, "Oooohhh Mama these are perfect!!" Yep. That's why they pay me the big bucks. LOL
I'm not responsible for my friends who show up with um... Pirate's punch. Am I? And FYI, Cruzan Mango Rum is not gluten free. Man I love Nurse Nicki. She comes in, makes herself right at home and thinks she lives here or something. I adore that.
Today was Adrain's birthday and I gave him a photo book of his trip to Africa, but somehow missed an entire file with Massai photos. How on EARTH did I do that? I am making him Indian food tonight though, because I'm pretty sure he left a piece of his heart there. And peaches and cream pie. I think I can make up for it with that.
It's all so pretty. And when you're a little girl, it means so much to have a pretty party.
Right now I'm reading "Gift from the Sea" by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. It's like a distant and old fashioned mentor's hug. I can't quite decide if I love it or not... I know I like it...
There might not be much more fun, than having a reason to take tons of photos. Snapping for my Etsy store today... Gosh I love this job!
There's a rule in our house. On your birthday, you must be woken up with cake- preferably a cupcake, and a candle. And everyone else must be up and sing happy birthday to you. And then you must eat that cake for your breakfast. It's important to follow the rules.
My mom-in-law came for dinner. I have to say, that woman is such a kick in the pants. Oh we laughed and laughed and talked about the funniest things like painting our hands with Elmer's glue as kids and peeling it off. It was fun to get her all to ourselves and not have to share her with Adrain's other siblings. I made a simple shrimp salad with a chive vinaigrette and it was yummy. Such a good night...
I love my kids. My boy makes me giggle more and more, each day. How I love him. I also nabbed a book by American Girl, on "growing up." And flipping through it, I know it's time to begin reading it... but oh I'm not ready for all those talks just yet!! I hope I can make that girl time as much fun as my Mama did. Like joining a special club. I still remember that. It made the growing up process something to look forward to...
I might be in love with this putty-colored cardigan that I got at Target in the clearance section last month. I seem to wear it every other day. Though it's better than my yoga pants, I couldn't help the pony tail. Oops. Mom-wear. Also, I'm standing on tip toes. I wish I was taller. I'm just saying. Also, I love these old Target bootcut jeans better than every other pair of jeans in my closet. How funny is that? The cheapies are the favorites.
Can I be raw and real today and not scare anyone away cause so far I've really scaled down my raw-ness in my Dear Diary snippets, so as not to lose all my readers. I snapped this photo as I made it to my car after a six mile walk. The third one this week. It strikes me, as I review this past month, that I'm pushing my friends back right now, and doing an awful lot of alone-time chewing on things. I've shut my phone off a lot this month. I've said "no" a lot this month. I've secluded myself a lot this month. I've hid a lot this month. It hasn't been the most fun month of my life, that's for sure... but it seems that sometimes it's appropriate to do those things, if only for a short time... and if only so something can be achieved through it. Solitude is often a necessary means of finding oneself again. Right now, I'm intentionally swimming in it. And I find myself realizing that though you may push your friends away.... the good ones always push back. They take a momentary "no" but say, "okay, well how about next week?" I find it incredible that every single woman in my life is just that kind of friend. They know, even if we haven't really talked about it, that I'm struggling. Not myself. Working it out. Two years of doubts, fears, frustrations, and questions hitting me full circle, unable to keep the balls in mid-air a second longer. It's okay to let them drop sometimes so I'm letting them drop, and I'm asking the questions. Doing the work. I know my friends are there, like a safety net on the periphery of my struggle. I'm so grateful.
Today we worked on our garden, prepping it for plants. First, we needed to yank out the weeds, turn over the soil, and for good measure, we cleaned it up, ripping it down to become a shorter, more accessible raised bed. I love how my man took charge, enlisted the help of our hoodlums, and I love that my daughter came outside ready to work in the cutest ensemble she owns, complete with pink flower belt, and darling hair that she styled her self. I love that she accessorized for this day outside with her Daddy. I love that she dresses cute to impress him. I love that he is impressed but still sends her back inside to change into older clothes! She is my child, of that, there is no question. I love how Adrain patiently instructed them both, and saw them as true helpers, not as patience taxers. He is such an amazing man.
After a full day of weeding, shopping for plants, managing kiddos, and planting a garden, I am tired. And covered in dirt. And my hair is crazy because I let the air dry it. I look like a woman wearing a lion's mane. And my children love it. The End.
Sometimes a girl needs a little pick-me-up. I'm not saying a girl can't be "enough" with out one... but a little pedicure, swipe of shimmery shadow, creamy blush, and dab of glossy pink color can't hurt either. I seem to run out of everything at the same time. I don't know why that is, but it sure is fun to stock back up again.
And with that, I conclude my April 365. It was a tired month, if there can be such a thing. It was sad at moments. It made me dig deep. It was also filled with tender moments and sweet celebrations. Most of all... it was filled, and I suppose that's really living. But if April brought showers... (and it sure enough did) I'm hoping for the flowers that May promises to bring.